It’s upsetting that it is upsetting. 40 that is. Yet here I am, giving my self away in a blog full of incomplete sentences to try and get my point across. It started on this day, last year, when I turned 39. It was a gnawing, unsettling feeling that I figured must be hormones. I’m not the kind of gal who gets caught up in age, I mean, you are only as young as you feel, and forty is the new thirty, and age is just a number and blah, blah, blah…but the feeling was there and it grew a little more every day for the next 365 days. And
Come November of this year I will be 40. FORTY. Say it. Forty years old. 40. That means I have been twenty, two times. This first 20 made sense. Those were my kid years. My crazy years. The second twenty was a blur. Those were the years I was suppose to be adulting. I’m just not sure I really got anywhere with that. It bothers me how much it bothers me, but I can’t seem to control the emotions. So here I am. On the brink of 40 and I am in a season where I am questioning everything. Even coffee.
Let me start by taking you back to
There are always blogs floating in my head. Sometimes they make it out, and sometimes they do not. I have had a horse blog floating around for quite sometime now, but it just never made it out. I would have never imagined the circumstances that would cause this blog to see the light of day. But here we are.
There are horse people, and there are…well…
Little J Robert had just gotten big enough to roam Dallas all by himself, when a miracle happened….. What?? How old was he you ask? Well, from what I can figure maybe 8 years old. Ohhhh. Don’t gasp in modern day shock by a little kid loafering through town all alone. This was the good old days. You know, before meth heads. And this was Dallas. Calm down extra crunchy granola mom. Times were different. So anyways, back to my story. J Robert had just gotten big enough to roam Dallas by himself, when a miracle happened….. The circus came to town!!
It was a miracle because when J Robert went
I remember when J Robert and I first got to be buddies, he would tell me these fantastic stories, in between spitting in a cup. You wouldn’t believe how much Red Man tobacco spit that joker can hold in his mouth and talk at the same time. Just before you think he may drown right in front of your very eyes, he will pause to spit. Some of his stories were so wild, I thought he may be pulling my leg. I’ll be honest, at first I would verify with my Papa, who grew up with J, and he said “Yep that’s true! I forgot all about that! Boy I