When the Circus Came to Town. -A J Robert Story.
Little J Robert had just gotten big enough to roam Dallas all by himself, when a miracle happened….. What?? How old was he you ask? Well, from what I can figure maybe 8 years old. Ohhhh. Don’t gasp in modern day shock by a little kid loafering through town all alone. This was the good old days. You know, before meth heads. And this was Dallas. Calm down extra crunchy granola mom. Times were different. So anyways, back to my story. J Robert had just gotten big enough to roam Dallas by himself, when a miracle happened….. The circus came to town!!
It was a miracle because when J Robert went to sleep the night before, everything was as it always was. When he woke up…there it was in all of its circussy glory. Picture it where the Motel is now. There was a big red and white tent, a merry go round, a gypsy fortune teller, an elephant, and a giant snake. J Robert said they wanted him to pay money to put that snake around his neck. He said “there ain’t no way I’m paying you to put that snake around my neck!” There was a big ole swing ride that slung you back and forth. There was also something J Robert described to me as a “fire wheel”. I have no idea if that was a ride or maybe a ring of fire that a motorcycle drove through. You’ll have to fill in your own blanks on that one.
One day J decided he wanted to ride the merry go round, which was fine except the circus was closed that day. No problem. J snuck right on in and crawled in through a hole up under the back side of the circus tent. Into the merry go round he went, flipped the rusty lever switch to the “on” position and helped himself to a wild ride. He bounced all over that merry go round horsey and was having himself a time…. Until the “show man” caught him. Boy was he mad. His face was as red as the hot cherry on the end of his big, fat, soggy, cigar. He hollered and carried on and threatened to keep J Robert forever and put him in the circus! Ah, but that show man was old and fat and smoked to many cigars. He was no match at all for J Robert’s little legs that took him fast as greased lightening. He lit out of that tent so fast, that show man just stood there hollerin in a cloud of dust and cigar smoke.
You’d think that would be enough of circus excitement, but no. J Robert got to thinking on that thing and decided he wanted to spend his money to have the old gypsy woman tell his fortune. Down in the pocket of his little overalls was his life savings. He reluctantly paid up and stuck out his little filthy hand that had chewing tobacco under his finger nails. The old fortune teller took his palm, squinted her eyes and read those lines and declared….J Robert you will have lots of women and plenty of money!! That was it. It literally took 5 seconds. Money and women. J Robert kinda liked the sound of that. He was pretty happy until… he realized he didn’t have no money anymore. Not even a plug nickel. And you know what? He didn’t have any women either. Money and women was fine for the future but he had spent his last dime on that fortune teller and he wanted a pack of baccer right NOW. He wanted his money back and he wanted it back right now. So he marched his little rear end right back up to the circus and demanded that gypsy woman give him a full refund. You may not know this, but you will after this story and you need to remember it for the rest of your life. The circus gypsy don’t give no refunds, but she does have a man that has a shotgun full of buckshot. He told J Robert, “you see that bypass down yonder? You got five minutes to hit it before I pump your butt full of buckshot.” So, the bypass was J’s immediate destination with no refund in tow.
To quote J Robert…. “That broke me from going back to the circus. I ain’t been since.”
Now friends, that’s a pretty good circus story, but let’s me and you think about that thing for a minute. Do you reckon that gypsy woman really did tell J Robert his future, and it’s full of women and money, or did she curse him right then and there when he came back for that refund and he never had either? The world may never know for sure.
…..but I’ve heard some stories.